These days, for many couples,doggy style has become the default alternative to missionary, even among those who consider themselves sexually adventurous.
For manycouples who aren’t acrobats, it can feel like there are only two choices: missionary or doggy. I don’t know about you, but I’m not holding myself up in aplank for several minutes, and there’s no chance my partner is lifting me against a wall.
The good news? There are plenty of sex positions that sit comfortably in between. If you’ve found yourself stuck in the doggy rut, it might be time to switch things up.
1. Sideways 69
The 69 position has essentially become a punchline at this point, but the two-sided oral position is one to behold. And it doesn’t have to be as demanding as the classic version.
“Traditional 69 can get surprisingly athletic,” explained Lisa Opel, sex educator at MYLO, a brand that sells intimate wellness and pleasure products.
“Turning onto your sides keeps the simultaneous oral but means nobody has to hold themselves up like they are midway through a core workout. Hands and toys are easy to bring in too. And if one person gets so distracted by receiving that they forget what they were doing, just roll with it, you’ve accidentally transitioned into oral or Pillow Princess, which is hardly a tragedy.”
2. The Lazy Susan
A lot of standing sex positions look fun, but seem like they’d wreak havoc on your joints and send blood rushing to your head. The lazy Susan, also known as the couch surfer, is the low-key antidote to all those wild, acrobatic positions. It’s convenient for a quickie, especially if you’re already hanging out in the living room.
The receiving partner bends over the arm of a couch while the giving partner enters them from behind. The receiver can grind against the firm-but-cushy arm for multiple forms of stimulation with minimal effort.
This position can also be applied to beds, and comes recommended by Bryony Lees, sex educator at sextoys.co.uk.
“One partner lies comfortably towards the edge of the bed while the other stays beside it,” Lees shared. “It changes up the angle without too much hassle, and you can use a pillow underneath the hips if you want more elevation.”
Looking to take this position up a notch? Have the receiver cross their ankles, which can engage their pelvic floor and gluteal muscles more tightly around the giving partner’s penis or dildo.
3. Lazy Doggy
All the perks of doggy style, without the effort. Once you go lazy doggy, you may have very little motivation to get back up. It’s essentially the same position, just lying down. Lisa Finn, a sex educator at Babeland, is always recommending this one.
“One of my most recommended positions is actually a riff on doggy, since there’s no arguing that the perks of doggy style sex are something that a lot of partners understandably seek out,” Finn explained.
“Lazy doggy (or assisted doggy) is a ‘hit-it-from-the-back’ position like doggy style, but instead of the receiving partner being on all fours, they’re lying over a positioning pillow or something else that props up their core, like the arm of a couch. Having yourself propped up on a positioning pillow allows the hips to open more, giving easier and deeper access for the person penetrating, as well as better angles for G-spot or prostate stimulation for the receiver.”
Finn continues: “Unlike standard doggy, in lazy doggy your weight is supported by the pillow underneath you, which means you don’t have to worry about using your arms to prop yourself up, which can be difficult to sustain on a soft surface like a mattress. Not having to worry about supporting your weight can allow you to really relax and focus on sensation, rather than balance.”
4. Grinding The Corn
Georgina Vass, a relationship and sex therapist, recommends the coital alignment technique (CAT), also known by its rather more entertaining name: “grinding the corn.”
“Coital alignment technique, or ‘grinding the corn,’ is a variation of the missionary position designed to optimise the likelihood of the female, or bottom, partner achieving orgasm through clitoral stimulation,” she explained.
“Rather than the standard in-and-out motion of missionary, the position uses a slow, controlled rocking, or ‘grinding,’ motion.
“The idea is that most of the clitoris lies beneath the surface in a wishbone shape. If the partner on top applies pressure to the vulva of the partner below, the unseen parts of the clitoris can be stimulated, potentially helping the bottom partner reach orgasm.
“To try CAT, start in the missionary position. The top partner then shifts their body slightly forward – their chest may end up closer to the other partner’s face. The bottom partner stays in the usual missionary position, with their legs open. Both partners should be pelvis-to-pelvis, with the penis or toy angled downward.
“Once the penis or toy is partially inserted, both partners can move away from the familiar in-and-out motion and instead ‘grind’ against each other using a rhythmic rocking movement.”
You don’t have to have hinges to do all these positions.5. The Hot Seat
If you like spooning, there are plenty of ways to switch up this lazy position.
The big spoon sits on the edge of the bed or a chair – which can be a great option if you have back issues – while the little spoon sits on top, facing away. The position offers some serious G-spot stimulation, along with the rear-entry angle that keeps so many of us coming back to doggy style.
But unlike doggy style, seated spooning gives the receiving partner much more control. They can easily adjust the depth and speed of penetration using their legs, making it a comfortable option for anyone who wants to stay in control without having to do all the work.
“If you’re usually having sex lying down, switching to a seated position can instantly make things feel exciting and fresh,” Finn explained. “The classic spooning position is already great for G-spot/prostate stimulation, and sitting gives the receiving partner even more control of the angle to find what feels best by leaning forward or back.”
6. Mutual Masturbation
There’s something inherently sexy about watching a partner touch themselves, and Tara Suwinyattichaiporn (also known as Dr. Tara), an intimacy and relationships expert and co-host of Celebs Go Dating, thinks it’s a low-stakes way to spice up your sex life. She wants us to try mutual masturbation the next time we have the urge to fall back on doggy style.
“This position involves partners lying next to each other and engaging in self-pleasure, either manually or with toys,” Suwinyattichaiporn explained.
“This is an amazing position for low effort while still involving each other’s sexual energy and orgasming together, which can be very bonding. Bonus points if partners can also engage with each other physically – for example, giving the male partner a few hand strokes or kissing. The male partner can kiss and lick the nipples while both engage in self-pleasure. Spicy, fun, easy and no penetration needed for orgasm.”
7. Face-Off
The best sex sometimes happens off the bed. Don’t worry, we won’t make you risk rug burn for a good orgasm. How about bringing a chair into the mix? It’s time to face off with your partner.
“One partner sits on the edge of the bed or on a sturdy chair while the other straddles them, facing towards them,” Opel explained. “The receiving partner gets plenty of control over depth and rhythm without needing a full squat or endless leg strength. You get kissing, eye contact if that’s your thing, and lots of access for hands. It works just as well for strap-on sex, which makes it easy to adapt across different bodies and couples.”
And if there happens to be a mirror beside you both, all the better.
8. The Velvet Spoon
Kate Moyle, a psychosexual therapist for LELO, the sexual wellness brand, is a big fan of switching up existing positions. Step aside, spooning – it’s time for the velvet spoon.
“A slower, less active position doesn’t necessarily have to mean boring, and spooning is a position with gentle but great versatility,” Moyle explained.
“Partners lie side by side, facing the same way, with the penetrating partner positioned behind. While it’s a non-facing position, it still offers a sense of intimacy and closeness, particularly as you can easily adapt it with neck kissing. The neck is one of the most popular non-genital erogenous zones due to its high density of nerve endings, which makes it very sensitive.”
Moyle continued, “You can also add other forms of simultaneous stimulation, such as nipple play and clitoral stimulation, either manually by either partner or by introducing a sex toy. A wand-style toy or bullet vibrator are good options for this, as they can be held by either partner or positioned and held by the thighs of the front partner. Another option would be a small finger vibrator, which can again be worn by either partner.
“A good water-based lubricant is also the perfect addition for clitoral play with either hands or a vibrator.”
9. Free-Hand Spooning
Ally Iseman, a relationship coach certified by the International Coaching Federation, wants you to level up your spooning with some hands-on action.
“Lie on your sides facing the same way, with the receiving partner’s back tucked against the penetrating partner’s chest,” she said. “The receiver slides their top knee forward toward their chest to open up the angle. Enter from behind, then trade thrusting for a slow, deep, synchronised rocking motion that keeps your hips pressed together. Use a belt to lasso your hips together if you’re both open to a little bondage, too.”
“In this position, you both have a hand free, so one of you can put it to the clitoris or hand the job over to a small vibrator,” she continued. “Or the receiving partner can guide the penetrating partner’s free hand wherever they want it along their torso, chest, hips, or neck, like that scene in the movie ‘Ghost.’
“Spooning keeps the rear-entry angle people love about doggy and gives the clitoris its seat back at the table. Nobody is holding up their own body weight, and nobody is watching your face for a reaction. A watched pot never boils, and a watched vulva rarely orgasms. Orgasm needs enough physical stimulation and enough psychological safety for the body to surrender. The ‘boring’ positions are often the ones that deliver both.”
10. The Sledge
“If you’re looking to switch things up, The Sledge can be a fun one to explore together,” explained April Maria, sexologist and sex educator at the sex toy brand Hot Octopuss. “It’s very similar to the missionary position; however, the top partner turns and lies in the other direction.”
“This position is not only easy to achieve and doesn’t require any bending or flexibility, but it also gives plenty of control over the movement, pace, and extra accessibility to the genitals. Both partners can use their hands to add extra touch to areas such as the clitoris, testicles, perineum and anus.”
Now for the logistics of this sleigh ride. “One partner lies on the bed with their legs slightly separated,” Maria explained. “The other partner sits on top, facing away, stretches their legs to their partner’s shoulders, and rests their chest on their partner’s legs.”
11. The Lotus
“The Lotus sounds much fancier than it actually is,” Lees explained. “One partner sits down while the other straddles them face-to-face. Being this close also makes it easy to add other kinds of stimulation at the same time, and combining different sensations can be great if orgasm is the goal.”
This position not only offers great grinding potential, but is extremely intimate. You get to have your bodies pressed flush together. Even without penetration, we recommend this position for the added sensations and intimacy.
12. Pillow-Supported Missionary
The most boring sex positions can get a complete makeover with one simple accessory. Sometimes that’s a bullet vibrator or a pair of handcuffs. Other times, it’s just a pillow.
“Sometimes all you need is a pillow,” Lees explained. “Placing one underneath the hips during missionary slightly changes the angle of the pelvis, which can make it easier to find the position that feels best for you. Once you’ve found that sweet spot, you can keep the angle and rhythm consistent rather than constantly readjusting, which can be really helpful when you’re trying to build toward orgasm.”
You can buy a pillow designed specifically for sex, or simply use one you already have. We’d recommend changing the pillowcase afterward, though.
13. Butterfly
The butterfly is a surprisingly low-effort position that adds extra intimacy and pleasure without requiring Olympic-level flexibility.
“Butterfly is a great pick if you’re into deeper penetration,” Finn shared. “With the penetrating partner standing, they can find a deeper angle, while positioning the receiving partner at the edge of the bed opens the hips for even more access.”
In this position, the receiving partner lies on their back at the edge of a bed or other sturdy surface, while the penetrating partner stands or kneels between their legs. The penetrating partner does most of the work, while the receiving partner can adjust their legs for comfort or to change the angle of stimulation.
Finn continued, “Since the receiving partner is lying down and doesn’t need their arms to support their weight, their hands are open to be able to touch themselves – or are available to be tied up, like with a set of bed restraints. And because of the angle, butterfly makes eye contact easy, which can be a major bonus if you like seeing your partner’s reactions and watching each other as you play.”
14. Snow Angel
Despite the frosty name, this position can even be a great option during a heatwave, since you’re not pressed up against each other the whole time.
The snow angel takes inspiration from the classic missionary position but gives it a bit of an upside-down twist. The receiver lies flat on their back while the giver lies the other way around, face down. Think of it as 69, but with your genitals positioned together rather than at each other’s faces.
The receiver then wraps their legs around the giver’s back to elevate their pelvis for better penetration. They’ll be very much in the driving seat when it comes to thrusting, while the giver can hold onto their butt to help control the motion. There should also be some nice clitoral grinding in the process.
“The snow angel position provides an angle of entry that’s much different than most other positions, which provides a really unique sensation with each thrust,” Finn explained. “The position also allows for plenty of body-to-body contact, which is great if you like grinding or more pressure against the clit during sex. And unlike with most penetrative positions, the receiving partner is the one that gets a front-row view of their partner’s butt, giving plenty of opportunity to bring some back door stimulation into the mix. Use fingers or a toy to stimulate around the rim or to explore some penetration/prostate play, or simply squeeze, slap, or spank their cheeks as you play.”
